


This Is the Second Death

by Missy_dee811



Category: Captain America (Comics), Iron Man (Comics), Marvel (Comics), Marvel 616, Secret Avengers
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Blood Loss, Canon-Typical Violence, Commander Rogers, Espionage, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Getting Together, Heroic Age (Marvel), Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Past Character Death, Past Sharon Carter/Steve Rogers, Poisoning, Recovered Memories, Spies & Secret Agents, Torture, Undercover Missions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-28
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:20:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24959032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Missy_dee811/pseuds/Missy_dee811
Summary: It’ll be like old times.Well, in those days, Iron Man was my bodyguard, and Steve never went anywhere as a civilian. He was always in his suit and always packed his shield. These days, the public knows I’m Iron Man. And Steve no longer carries the shield.It’s not his anymore.I saw to that myself. It’s Bucky’s now.[Written for the Iron Man Big Bang 2019/2020.]
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Comments: 8
Kudos: 38
Collections: Iron Man Big Bang 2019/2020





	This Is the Second Death

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Lets_call_me_Lily](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lets_call_me_Lily/gifts).



> The title is from Revelation 21:8: But as for the cowardly, the faithless, the polluted, the murderers, the fornicators, the sorcerers, the idolaters, and all liars, their place will be in the lake that burns with fire and sulfur, which is the second death.

They were all gathered. He cleared his throat. There was no reason to be nervous. The mission was simple. Routine, even.

“We’ll be undercover. I’ll be the buyer and Steve… Steve will be my bodyguard,” said Tony, turning to face Steve.

Steve nodded.

_It’ll be like old times._

_Well, in those days, Iron Man was my bodyguard, and Steve never went anywhere as a civilian. He was always in his suit and always packed his shield. These days, the public knows I’m Iron Man. And Steve no longer carries the shield._

_It’s not his anymore._

_I saw to that myself. It’s Bucky’s now._

“I still can’t believe you gave Bucky my shield,” said Steve.

“What the hell did you want me to do?”

Tony paced around the room. They were in Steve’s office at SHIELD. It had been some time since Tony had been here. Steve was running a team, one without Tony.

“You were dead, and you left me this letter – thanks, by the way – saying you wanted the shield to be passed down. And in the same letter, you asked me to take care of Bucky.”

“That didn’t mean I wanted Bucky to have the shield!”

Steve had his hands on his utility belt. It was odd to see him in this uniform. It wasn’t the only Tony thought of when he thought of Steve. Not that he thought of Steve.

“You weren’t here, Steve! What was I going to do? Ask your hallucination?” 

Pacing around the room wasn’t working anymore. He had told himself, on the way here, he wouldn’t vent. He wouldn’t lose his temper, but this conversation with Steve was going nowhere.

Steve took a deep breath and it drew Tony’s attention. Seemed they were both frustrated. He stopped and faced Steve. Maybe, this wasn’t a hopeless conversation. Maybe, they were making some progress.

“You’re right,” said Steve.

“Say that again. I want to isolate this moment and recall it whenever we get into a fight,” said Tony.

“You’re right, Tony. I should’ve been clear,” he said.

Tony took him in. All of him, from head to toe.

“Thank you. And I mean that,” he said, much too honest.

“I know, Tony,” said Steve. And there he was, the Steve he knew too well. The Steve that wanted them to work together.

They were quiet for a moment. Hearing Steve apologize – in and of itself, a rarity – had quelled Tony’s anger. He had no bite.

“So why did you give Bucky the shield,” asked Steve, taking his seat and motioning for Tony to take the seat before him.

Right, back to business. Always business.

“I couldn’t ask you why you left both the shield and Bucky – who doesn’t need anyone watching over him because he’s a trained killer and one of the best sharpshooters I’ve ever met – in my care, so to speak, so I did what I thought _you_ wanted me to do,” said Tony.

“Approached Clint?”

“ _Oh_ , for fuck’s sake. That… That’s beside the point. I had to fight off Bucky and get him to read the stupid letter –”

“You thought my letter was stupid?”

“Goddammit Steve, just listen.”

Steve was staring at him. He crossed his arms and bid Tony to continue.

“It made sense,” said Tony, pounding on the desk.

“Give Bucky the shield and a sense of purpose and your immortal soul would be at peace. I was delusional, but that much mad sense! You were dead Steve, I just wanted to please you.”

“I thought you didn’t believe in souls,” said Steve, carefully ignoring the second half of that statement.

“No,” corrected Tony. “I don’t believe in God.”

Steve looked bemused.

“Why does this feel like an interview? Am I on _60 Minutes_?”

He had neglected his drink, there was condensation all around the glass, and the napkin below it was soaked. He took a sip of it anyway. Refreshingly, it was ginger ale.

He started walking down the block. Tony had parked his car around the corner. They’d found parking almost immediately. Steve had been pleased. They hadn’t needed to park in a garage and pay their outrageous fees. Tony didn’t mind paying but preferred the convenience of being on the street. Makes driving off easier.

They walked side-by-side, with their hands in their pockets. Steve had his gloves, but Tony had left them in the car.

“Bet you’re regretting leaving those gloves in the compartment, aren’t you?”

“I hate you so much.”

Steve smirked and said, “You only wish you hated me.”

“I’ve been thinking about that conversation we had the other day,” said Steve.

“What’s there to discuss,” said Tony, unsure where this was going. “I thought we had covered it all?”

Tony reached for the last of the sweet potato fries.

“Nothing, I just couldn’t believe you asked Clint.”

“Really, we’re doing this now?”

“It was your idea to come here, Tony,” replied Steve.

“Yes, it was my idea to come here for dinner, not to play 21 Questions.”

Steve took a sip from his water. This was the second pitcher he’d finished. The server had to come back with a third. Tony had apologized profusely.

“My friend’s very thirsty,” said Tony, pointedly looking at Steve.

“I’m not going to apologize for wanting more water. Besides, the fries were salty.”

“Steve, they’re French fries. Of course, they were salty. I know you grew up during the Depression, but surely, you had salt.”

“Of course, we had salt, Tony. Don’t be ridiculous.”

“Oh, I’m the one that’s ridiculous? You just drank pitcher of water after pitcher of water, devoured two bacon cheeseburgers and two plates of fries. All this, and somehow, you’re eating what’s left on my plate.”

“Should I stop,” asked Steve with a sweet potato fry in midair.

Tony took a deep breath and pushed his plate towards Steve.

“Just finish it,” he said, resigned.

Steve smiled.

“Now, back to my question. Why Clint?”

Tony ran his hand across his face. Suddenly, he was much too tired for this conversation.

“It doesn’t matter,” said Tony.

He had found a way to get his memories back. Slowly and painstakingly. He started by mapping his own brainwaves, then mapping the brainwaves of those around him. He had started with those at SHIELD. As he got more and more data, a picture started to emerge. Little by little, he’d be able to recall those lost memories.

It was by no means perfect, but it was better than nothing. It was better than missing a whole year of his life.

It had meant reconciling with who he had been and who he was now. It had meant many long, drawn-out, and uncomfortable conversations, but he was willing to pay that price. 

“Clint turned me down,” said Tony.

Steve ran his fingers through his cropped hair. He’d gotten a haircut only days prior, but it still felt much too short. Not that it had much time to grow, but his hair grew faster than most.

“Yeah, because you asked him to be Captain America _at my funeral_.”

“You were dead, and I was malfunctioning,” said Tony, matter of fact.

“Clearly. You and the country must’ve been in a dire state.”

“Can’t believe you’re joking about this. The next time you die and leave behind a bullshit letter, I’m going to ignore it.”

“No, you’re not.”

“Probably not.”

After that, they ordered dessert. The server had recommended the blueberry pie, the blueberries were in season. Steve had agreed.

The chatted while they ate.

“They’re waiting for us at SHIELD,” said Steve.

“I hate you,” said Tony, pulling his wallet from his suit’s inner pocket.

“No, you don’t. And stop being dramatic. It’ll be a quick meeting. We’ll go over the mission details. Shouldn’t take too long,” said Steve.

“You always say this, and they always drag on.”

When the server came back to check on them, Tony handed her his credit card. When she came back with the receipt, Steve took it from him.

Before Tony could protest, he took the pen too and started to sketch. He drew a shield and Tony in his armor. Then, he slid back the receipt so Tony could sign.

“Do you think she knew it was us?”

“Well, she will now,” said Steve, admiring his work from afar.

Tony pulled out a crisp $100 bill and placed it under the receipt.

“Let’s go before I change my mind and fly away.”

“Without me? You wouldn’t.”

Tony smirked. He grabbed his jacket and slid from the booth. He’d put it on once they were outside.

Steve eyed him but opted to say nothing. He didn’t want to start another argument. Tony treated outwear as a fashion statement and nothing more. 

Steve caught the server staring at them. Tony turned and saw her too.

“It’s because you’re zipping my jacket.”

“Because you refuse to do it yourself.”

“It’s not even that cold.”

“I remember what it’s like to have pneumonia.”

“I’m surprised, since I’ve had it more recently than you.”

“Thank you for making my point.”

“What’s the point in being a genius if you’re going to stand here and outsmart me?”

“We’re a good team,” said Steve, and Tony vowed to remember that. 

Steve couldn’t help but watch Tony, from the corner of his eye. He seemed at ease, though they were quickly approaching the Triskelion.

Once seated, he’d taken off his jacket, so it was hanging haphazardly from the headrest. Steve had tried to fix it, but Tony had swatted his hand away.

As if an afterthought, he’d taken the gloves out of the compartment as Steve howled with laughter. 

He drove with one hand in the center of the steering wheel, the other on the gear shift. Steve preferred driving stick-shift himself and had been pleased to learn Tony did too. Thereafter, Tony left the automatic cars behind whenever he offered to go out with Steve.

Jan called them dates and frankly, neither Steve nor Tony objected.

Usually, they discussed work: Tony’s employees, SHIELD agents, the ever-changing Avengers roster, among other things. Once exhausted, the conversation shifted.

They talked about their love lives. Tony’s paramours were far and few between these days, but he still dated beautiful women for however long it would last. Steve and Sharon had been on the rocks often and had finally called it quits. In some ways, it was a comfort. They worked well on the field, and they were still great friends, but they were incompatible as lovers.

Steve demanded too much of her and never gave her enough in return.

It was no way to carry on.

Tony was sympathetic. 

Heated seats were standard for this model and Steve loved it. He could indulge in this small luxury.

Steve had let it slip that he loved the feel of freshly laundered towels, warm to the touch. Days later, Tony had installed a towel warmer in his bathroom. He hadn’t known such a simple comfort could make all the difference, but it did. Likewise, with the seat warmers.

Steve kept his jacket on, knowing it would be a short ride.

For once, Steve had been right. The meeting was short. Maria was in good spirits, a rarity where Tony was concerned.

“You know I’m not her favorite person,” said Tony as they were getting out of the car.

“Yes, but you never told me why,” said Steve.

“We slept together. Before you say anything, it was a spur-of-the-moment thing, and while I don’t necessarily regret it, I’d rather not have crossed that line. She was my subordinate after all…”

“Huh.”

“You’re honestly surprised by this?”

“That you would sleep with her? No. That she would sleep with you? Yes,” said Steve.

Tony groaned.

“I don’t want to say it was completely meaningless, but this is exactly why I didn’t want to tell you.”

“Who am I going to tell?”

“Just… Make sure she doesn’t find out. If it’s all the same to you, I’d appreciate keeping all my appendages,” said Tony.

Steve laughed. “She wouldn’t hesitate to kill either one of us, so your secret is safe with me.”

Bucky couldn’t make it to the meeting. Natasha had said she would relay the information to him. Steve thanked them all for their time and they filed out of the conference. Only Tony stayed behind.

“Where to?”

“Well, we’re flying out in the morning, so I was going to head home and pack. We’ll be there for a while.”

Tony nodded before adding, “I’m surprised you don’t have a duffle ready to go.”

“At this point, I should, but I’ve been on so many back-to-back missions. I didn’t have the time,” said Steve.

“So, are you going back to Brooklyn?”

“Unless you have something in mind,” said Steve.

“Well, yes and no,” said Tony.

Steve eyed him quizzically.

“First, we go back to your apartment and I’ll help you pack,” said Tony.

“I don’t need the help,” said Steve.

“Oh, but you do. We’ll stop for some takeout, since I’m sure you’re hungry again, and I should probably eat before going to bed. And then, we’ll drive back to the Tower,” said Tony.

Steve still wasn’t convinced.

“Why stay in Brooklyn? It’ll save you an expensive cab ride or a long train ride. And you can make sure I’m up, bright and early,” said Tony, cheerfully.

“What’s the catch,” asked Steve.

“No catch.”

“I know you’re lying.”

“You’ll have to trust me, Cap,” said Tony, as he walked out of the conference. He noted, Steve hadn’t corrected him. 

Steve held the door. “Fine.”

Tony smiled, bright and wide. “Perfect.”

“Remind me to buy you a new wardrobe,” said Tony. He was sitting on the edge of the bed watching Steve pack the last of his shoes. The duffle was much too small but would have to do.

“I don’t need all of this,” said Steve.

He was frustrated, Tony knew.

“Trust me,” he said.

He shifted on the bed and pushed in the last of the items into the bag. He knew Steve could do this by himself, but he wanted to help.

“C’mon big guy, zip it for me.”

Arriving at the Tower, Steve made his way to his quarters, and Tony made his way to his workshop.

“You’ll know where to find me,” said Tony, waving as Steve stepped off the elevator.

Steve nodded just as the doors closed.

Tony held a breath he hadn’t known he was holding. They would be gone for several weeks. He knew everyone would be fine. It wasn’t the first time he left for an extended period, but it was the first time he’d be with Steve for so long.

What if it all went awry?

It had been a long time since he’d been out of the city for a significant amount of time. Though he had the utmost confidence in his team, and in Pepper, most of all, he was feeling… Apprehensive.

Everything was running smoothly. Too smoothly.

No.

That was the anxiety speaking.

It would be fine.

They’d be out of the country for a few weeks. The others could handle whatever came their way. Rhodey would be Iron Man in his absence. He knew the armor was in good hands and the Avengers would be more than fine.

Tony was using a new armor. He had finished testing it a few days ago and it was ready to go. Someone would have to hack Tony’s private servers to get their hands on this propriety tech, and though nothing was impossible, it was highly unlikely. Besides, it would take them a few days to crack the code, which would give him a head start.

That should’ve been enough to quell Tony’s anxiety, but it wasn’t.

Hours later, he heard the doors open. Without looking up, he knew it was Steve, coming to fetch him. Tony had promised he’d be up bright and early, but once he had started working, it was hard to stop.

Knowing he be away had only spurred his desire to get as much done. 

He was always uneasy leaving the workshop unattended for any stretch of time. Usually, he was flying out to the West Coast for a few days. This time, he and Steve would be much further away and for much longer. He wouldn’t be able to drop everything and fly back if someone broke in and took something.

Tony jumped when Steve tapped him on the shoulder.

“I’m sorry, I –”

“It’s fine, Tony. We have to be up and out in a few hours, you can sleep on the flight, but we need to catch it first.”

Yawning, he saved his work and shut it down.

“Are you going to tuck me in?”

“If that’s what it takes,” said Steve.

Steve was so close. Tony he could hear his breathing, and right now, he wasn’t.

It had all been leading up to this. Jan was right. They had been going on dates but hadn’t wanted to call them that. It was the only explanation. It was the only reason why he tried to schedule all his meetings early in the day, so his afternoon and evening would be free, so he could spend it with Steve.

It was the only thing that made sense. They’d been meeting for lunch and dinner for weeks. Tony was starting to think they only ate when they were together.

He wasn’t sure what compelled him to say it, but he said, “I wish getting into bed with you was this easy.”

“It could be,” said Steve, closing the distance.

That couldn’t be right.

“Ignore what I just said, it’s been a long day, and tomorrow’s going to be even longer,” said Tony.

He hoped Steve would pull away before something else happened, something he’d soon regret. Instead, Steve placed his hands on his shoulders.

He sighed. He was so tired. He had been hunched over and working for hours. His back was starting to hurt. He wasn’t that young anymore.

He should’ve gone to sleep hours ago. He shouldn’t have come down here. All of this could’ve been avoided if he had just called it a night. He should’ve kept his mouth shut.

Instead, Steve’s hands were running down his arms and that small fire that had been rekindled, burst. 

He faced Steve.

“Say that again but look at me this time,” said Steve.

This was a new expression. Tony didn’t know how to categorize it. He was too tired to give it much thought, but the fact that there were still expressions he didn’t know and couldn’t recognize marveled him.

There was still so much he didn’t know.

Tony licked his lips. They felt so dry. The workshop was climate controlled; he shouldn’t feel clammy.

“Sleep with me,” said Tony.

Short and sweet.

Steve quirked his brow. “Say it again.”

“Steve, sleep with me.”

“Why now?”

“Why not? Hell, I don’t know what compelled me to say it the first time. I’m tired, you’re here, and I… God, it’s just…”

Steve cupped his cheek. “Look at me.”

“No, it’s too much, and I don’t want to have this come back and haunt me later, when I’m inevitably captured and tortured.”

Steve caressed his cheek and Tony couldn’t move, didn’t want to move.

“No one’s kidnapping you, and they’re definitely not torturing you. Not if I have anything to say about it.”

“Please, Steve, I won’t ask a fourth time.”

“Just sleep?”

“Yes? No? What do you want?”

“This,” said Steve as he leaned in to kiss him.

Tony deepened the kiss and when Steve tried to pull away, wrapped his arms around his neck, bringing their bodies closer.

“Bed,” said Steve.

Triumphantly, Tony noticed he was slightly out of breath.

Steve shucked off his suit jacket and start unbuttoning his shirt when Tony cupped his cheeks and kissed him.

“Do we have to sleep?”

“Yes.”

“But I don’t want to sleep,” said Tony.

“You’re only saying that because you haven’t laid down.”

Tony knew this was true. His bed was incredibly comfortable and the second his face hit the pillow, that would be the end of any and all discussion.

“Why do you have to be a smartass?”

“Isn’t that why you like me?”

“I never said I liked you,” said Tony.

He had unbuckled his belt and unbuttoned his slacks when Steve’s hands reached for his hips. Tony crawled into his lap.

Blessedly, he was wearing sweatpants.

“You didn’t have to say it,” said Steve, peeling off his shirt in one, fluid movement.

Tony’s eyes followed his movements, engrossed.

_Oh, but I did._

Steve woke up first. The soft light of dawn was creeping across the room. Steve caressed Tony’s back. He was sleeping, half on the bed, and half on him. Not that he minded. Tony was his personal weighted blanket, and their bodies were warm where they touched.

He thought this would feel different. They had never kissed before. Though, after last night, they couldn’t say that anymore. They had spent most of the night kissing and exploring each other’s bodies.

All above the waist. Tony had wanted to do more, but Steve had insisted they should take it slow. Now, Tony wasn’t so sure.

Part of Tony acknowledged he was overthinking things. It was a repeat of the situation in the workshop. Part of him wondered if Steve really wanted him. Both their working relationship and their friendship had had its ups and downs. Perhaps, Steve had seen the light and recognized it would all end in chaos and Tony was no good for him.

Part of Tony thought maybe he was the one who had deluded himself into thinking this is what he wanted. He hadn’t been with anyone in months and he welcomed the contact.

He knew that last part was wrong. Tony had yearned for this all those months he thought Steve was gone and he’d never see him again. He had yearned for this when they were working together, and Steve was seeing someone else.

It was long since he and Sharon had ended things.

Tony couldn’t bear the thought that maybe, he was the rebound.

Maybe this hadn’t been the best idea. At least, not right before an undercover mission. Sure, they were going to be undercover as a couple, but it would be easier to pretend when he was sure that’s all it was.

Suddenly, he was too hot. He needed to get out from under Steve. He reached for Steve’s cheek and caressed it, softly.

“Steve,” he half-whispered.

“Yes?”

“You’re still here,” he said. He still couldn’t believe it.

“I’m still here.”

“Tell me that wasn’t a dream.”

“That wasn’t a dream.”

“What happens now?

“We get ready and fly halfway around the world. And then, take it from there,” said Steve, honestly.

It was the best plan of action.

“Is this real,” asked Tony.

“Yes. For as long as you want it to be,” said Steve.

He leaned in to kiss him. They could take this slow. This was new to them both. They’d never been with each other.

Steve sat up and pulled him into his lap. Tony moaned softly and deepened the kiss. He could get used to this. He could get used to waking up to an arm around his waist.

He could get used to his warmth, to his hands roaming down his back, and pushing him closer. He hadn’t let himself want something so out of reach, but now, he could, because now, it was his.

“I like you like this,” said Steve.

Tony let out a shaky breath and smiled.

“So, you like me?”

“Like this.”

Madripoor was always an interesting place. It was a playground for the rich but also a haven for thieves. Tony had been here one too many times to count.

The last time he had been here, he had faced Madame Hydra, and he was hoping to avoid her at all costs.

It had beautiful beaches and beautiful women, but this time, he wasn’t here for either. He was here for a weapons conference. He had filled Steve on all the details. This weapons conference was showcasing a piece of tech built by a start-up based on stolen proprietary tech. The tech itself wasn’t his, but it was based on his ideas, which had been stolen.

He wasn’t happy about it, so he was here to steal back his proprietary tech. He didn’t want anyone else to get their hands on it.

The plan was simple. Go to the weapons conference as a buyer to lure out the real seller, not just the spokesperson at the conference. He didn’t care about them.

Steve had his own mission. He was gathering intel. It was for the spies on his team. Tony had asked why none of them were available, why they couldn’t gather this intel on their own, but Steve hadn’t replied. He said it was “need to know,” and Tony, didn’t need to know.

“That hurts.”

“It’s the truth.”

“Are you this blunt with all your lovers?” Tony asked.

Steve nodded, and they left it at that. 

The conference was tonight. Steve and Tony were staying in safe house. Steve hadn’t wanted to say in whose safe house they were staying, but Tony quickly figured it was Natasha’s. She always leaves a bit of herself behind as if she were shedding skin wherever she went.

They settled in. The flight had been long, though shorter than a commercial flight would’ve been.

“When was the last time you flew commercial?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” said Tony.

Steve laughed and said, “Yeah, that’s what I expected you to say.”

“I usually fly in my armor. I’m usually flying to one of my houses, so I don’t need to bring anything with me.”

“I didn’t realize you flew in the armor. Doesn’t it get… Lonely?”

“Usually, it’s on autopilot and I just sleep. It’s not a comfortable or restful sleep, but it makes the time pass, and that’s all that matters.”

They reviewed the intel they’d been given at the meeting. Maria had collected information on the sellers. There was plenty SHIELD didn’t know, and it was their job to fill in the blanks, but they’d been given more than enough. She’d given them a list of names, their employers, what they were selling, and to whom.

Natasha had given them information on the buyers. Why they were here, what they were looking for, and for whom. She had also given Steve the location of her safe house.

If nothing happened to them while they were here, he’d be sure to send Natasha a gift for her generosity. She didn’t disclose her safe house to anyone.

“I wouldn’t be surprised if she never came back to this one,” said Steve.

Tony nodded.

They hid their gear throughout the apartment. Having showered and dressed, they made their way. Tony had found it strange to watch Steve check and load his weapons. Bucky always carried a gun, but Steve… Steve was different. He relied on the shield and his bare fists, but that wouldn’t do any good here. Not if they intended on keeping their anonymity.

The magnetic shield would blow their cover.

Tony kept his suit in the nanites that surrounded him like a second skin. They were transparent and would activate on his command. It meant he didn’t have to carry such heavy artillery.

“It’s odd to see you loading your gun,” said Tony.

Steve looking at the gun in his hands.

“I hate that I have to do this, but I need to protect you, and I don’t know that I’ll be fast enough to stop anyone going after you.”

Tony put his hand on his shoulder and tipped his chin.

“I know how hard this is, so thank you.”

“Don’t thank me yet,” said Steve.

The first day of the conference was a waste. They walked and walked and walked. Tony ran background checks. He used his armor and compared his findings to SHIELD’s database. They identified several people, but not any of the people on their list.

Steve had quickly memorized the list after reading it. Then, he learned the layout of the building. Once Tony had gathered enough information on the guests in attendance, they left. There was nothing more to be gained from standing around and walking.

Besides, if they left now, they’d have just enough time to grab something to eat before all the restaurants closed.

“I doubt this is what Maria meant when she said, ‘keep busy,’” said Steve.

“Who cares? This naan is delicious,” said Tony, taking another bite.

Upon leaving the restaurant, they split up, and made their way back to the safe house. Steve arrived first and waited with bated breath for Tony’s arrival. Only a few minutes late, Steve welcomed him with a searing kiss.

“Are you always this nervous when I’m out of your sight?”

“Yes.”

The second and third day played out in much the same way. They arrived, blended in with the crowd, gathered information, and waited. They waited for one of the sellers to strike up conversation or one of the buyers to make their way through the crowd.

There were presentations and speeches.

“If I were a supervillain, I’d have a launch party, not some shit like this,” said Tony.

The fourth day more than made up for the monotony of the first three days. Shortly after arriving, Tony saw her in the distance.

“You’re not going to like who I just saw.”

“Who?”

“Viper,” said Tony.

“I thought you overthrew her?”

“I did,” said Tony.

“What do you think she wants?”

“Power, same as everyone else here. I don’t think we should be too worried,” said Tony.

The rest of the day went smoothly. Several players were in the building, and the case SHIELD was building against them relied on the data they gathered here. They stayed longer than they had any of the other nights.

The restaurants were long closed once they’d left. It could’ve been a late-night stroll if it hadn’t been for the unease settling over them. A few blocks from the safe house, they split, as they had done the previous nights.

This time, Tony arrived first. He removed the disguise and figuring Steve would arrive only moments later, opted to shower. When he stepped out of the shower and Steve wasn’t back, he knew something was wrong.

He checked his phone. The only number saved was Steve’s. He had no missed calls.

Dammit.

Just as he stepped out, he felt something poke his arm, and everything fade to black.

“Would you like to tell me why you’re here,” said Viper.

Steve was sitting in brightly lit warehouse. He was tied to the chair and had been doused with ice water. He was shivering but determined not to speak. He knew she was trying to break him, trying to get him to divulge any information, and he wasn’t going to give it to her.

“What do you want with that device?”

“What device?”

Steve was hoping she’d give him more information on the tech he and Tony were trying to find and bring back. They didn’t know what it did, just that it had the same mechanism

“No, no, no. I’m the one asking questions. And for that,” she said. “I’ll have to punish you.”

She sliced his torso from his rib to his navel.

Steve screamed. She caught him by surprise and cut deeper than he had expected. He hadn’t expected she’d go out of her way to capture them. He hadn’t expected she would restrain him and douse him with cold water over and over.

It would heal, but it hurt, and it was bleeding into his lap.

It didn’t help with the shakes either. 

“That device isn’t for you!”

The bleeding wasn’t slowing. Poison-tipped knife. He should’ve known.

She smiled once she realized he had understood he was in greater danger than it had seemed.

“I do wonder when your hero will rescue you.”

He dropped his head; the blood was still pooling in his lap. He would lose consciousness soon.

“Does he know? Does he know all the things you do now?”

She was toying with him. The shaking was getting worse, and still, no signs of Tony. Where was he? Was he captured? Was someone torturing him too?

“You’re one of us. You maim and murder just like we do. You’re no better than us.”

That was the last thing he heard before he blacked out.

He felt soft hands touch his face.

_Steve. Steve, wake up._

He opened his eyes, he was still tied to the chair, but someone else was here. Someone other than Viper. 

His eyes focused and he saw red.

“Natasha,” he said.

She nodded. “I came as fast as I could, but I’m afraid you’ve lost a lot of blood.”

He wanted to ask about Tony, most of all, but how she knew where they were. How she knew where to find them.

“I have that safe house under surveillance. It took me some time to find the exact location where she was keeping you, but I knew it wasn’t far. As for Tony, he’s here.”

She untied the rope and pulled him onto his feet. She pressed something into his stomach and told him to hold it there. He moved forward, slowly.

“Tony.”

“He’s fine, Steve. He’s fine. She drugged him, but you’re the one she was after.”

Back at the safe house, she cleaned and prep his wound.

“Thank you,” he said.

Tony was lying in bed, resting. He had been injected with poison, but the nanites were doing their job. Natasha said there was nothing more she could do before attending to Steve’s wound.

“You’re not bleeding anymore, but she still sliced your abdomen. Take it easy.”

“Will you go back?”

“I have to, Steve. Even if you don’t want to do this kind of work. This is what I know, and it’s what I know best. He’ll understand.”

“Viper has the device. She played us. We thought she was there to buy, but she was there to sell,” said Tony.

He was sitting against the headrest, reading the report Natasha had written. After she left, she tracked down Viper.

“She moved it to a secure location. We’ll have to wait and see,” said Tony shutting the laptop and closing his eyes.

“We fucked up.”

“No, I did. I should’ve been honest with you, from the beginning,” said Steve.

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“I hate this. I hate being a spy, I hate going undercover, I hate these missions.”

“So why do you do it?”

“Because… Because I don’t know where I fit anymore,” said Steve.

“Riddle me this,” said Tony. “Why did we have to be a couple on this mission? We were just collecting information.”

“The seller was expecting a couple who’s worked together for a long time. I didn’t know the seller was Viper – none of us did. The seller wasn’t supposed to know the couple just that they were a couple. It should’ve been Natasha and Bucky, but they’re on another assignment,” said Steve.

“I asked you, before we left, if this was real, and you said yes.”

Steve nodded.

“Please tell me you didn’t lie. Please tell me these last few days, the last few nights we’ve spent together. It wasn’t just for the mission.”

“Tony, it wasn’t.”

He was silent for a long time.

They finished analyzing the data they had gathered while they recuperated and returned home. After the mission debrief, they made their way to the elevator.

“You should quit,” said Tony. “Quit the team, let Natasha, Bucky, and whoever else is on this taskforce handle it.”

“And do what?”

“We can go back to being Avengers.”

“I’d like that very much,” said Steve.

“Then it’s done.”

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Art Post: This Is the Second Death](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24974002) by [Lets_call_me_Lily](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lets_call_me_Lily/pseuds/Lets_call_me_Lily)




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